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My actual last day in 5th grade. 

The kids were surprised. Most were confused. When I explained they said they were sad G was feeling sick and our trip was canceled, but they were happy that I could be with them one more day. It was a good day and a quick day. Chapel, math test, social studies test, recess/birthday treats from a student, and read aloud time sprinkled among it all. Dismiss at 11:15. 

After the students had gone, Mrs. M came to get reacquainted with the classroom and where we left off in the lessons. Mrs. L brought lunch and we had a very enjoyable couple of hours chatting. 

It's interesting that Mrs. M and I have only met twice. Once for about 30 seconds when I subbed earlier in the year for the teacher next door, and the other when she and her husband visited the class to let them ask questions. So, we really don't know each other at all, even though we feel like we do. It's a strange bond between us, the tragedies we've both experienced. We did spend some time talking about our own losses. Journaling has helped her process much of her grief. Later she messaged me thanking me for the journal I had given her in the teacher care basket from Mt. Olive. It has been one of her favorites. Another favorite was one given to her from the Thrivent grant for grieving parents (G and I had written them about that opportunity; we were grateful for it ourselves). 

It's a blend of emotions talking about these things... sad but healing, happy to talk about our children and share our stories... happy to have another person who understands. 

Mrs. M sent me another message after our meeting; she has such a way with words. I won't share all of what she said, but she ended with, "I will also be praying for you this week. I imagine Easter will be joyous, yet so hard for both of us." So, so true.  

It's ironic; every time I think everyone has heard about Bekhor, someone new pops up and asks how my pregnancy is going. It's been long enough and hasn't happened recently so my guard is down. But later this afternoon an old college friend sent me a message checking in. Such a sweet message. Still a stab of pain. Still a chance to tell about his birth, his baptism, his resting in heaven whole and perfect with Jesus. And who can be sad about that? Especially in the midst of Holy Week. 

Job said it best in chapter one verse 21, "The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away. May the name of the Lord be praised." 💖